Strange and Surprising Encounters

I was an alien in the city of aliens on the High Great Plains of southeastern New Mexico. The green-skinned egg-headed ETs knew they were out of place. But I thought I was just in the wrong town. Eventually, I learned that I was also out of place.

The leading apparel was alien antenna headbands. There I was… stuck in Roswell and trying to climb the retail ladder. At that point, I was a district manager overseeing $18 million in revenue. But when I looked out my window, I saw a dusty boneyard where they park retired airplanes of diminishing value. It was time to move on.

The internet was still young, and Bed Bath & Beyond was a retail powerhouse. It seemed like the perfect place to sharpen my operations skills and swim in the deep blue waters and beyond. So, I flew to Phoenix for an interview. This is when I was first told that I was in the wrong place.

The interviews went swimmingly. First slot – nailed it. Second slot – killed it. As the interview day progressed, I kept feeling better and better. Until the interview with the HR Leader. That’s when it got uncomfortable.

I sat in the chair across from her desk. She came in and sat in the chair directly next to me. Her eyes scanned up and down. It made me feel like one of the interstellar creatures under study in a secret Roswell hanger.

“Does this make you uncomfortable?” she asked.

By a galactic measure, that was the hardest interview question of the day.

“You’re out of place,” she told me.

At this point, I thought she was from Mars. But eventually, I realized that she saw something in me that everyone else missed… including me.

The job offer came. I accepted my new operations job and started at Bed Bath & Beyond. Then… one day before Christmas, an email arrives. It read like “Ack ack, ack ack…ACK!” It may as well have been written in Martian. So, I picked up the phone.

“I’m sorry. I’m reading this email, and it doesn’t make sense. I’m in operations. This looks like HR.”

“Neil, I told you during your interview that you were out of place. We’re fixing that now, and it’s not your choice. Now you’re HR.”

I had been abducted, and Candy Russell, the HR Leader, was about to tell me why.

“Neil, too many HR folks think it’s their job to say ‘no.’ We need more HR leaders who understand operations, know how to motivate people, and build teams.”

That first year was rough. I didn’t know anything about HR. I didn’t know compliance, or how to do an investigation. I kept feeling like an alien in a strange land and breathing the strange gases of an outer atmosphere. But eventually it started clicking.

After 6 years, I left Bed Bath & Beyond and joined the world of healthcare. Hospice. It was the last stop for folks before heading to the next world.

One of the nurses stopped by my office and asked, “Neil, will you join me on a visit to an imminent patient?”

I thought we were heading to the world of the divine. That’s the day I learned the difference between imminent and eminent.

We arrived. The room was hot. But she was laying still and layered under several blankets. Her light shoulder-length hair partially covered her sunken pale face. Slowly, her chest shook as she gasped for breaths. Then we left and returned to the office.

The next day, the nurse stopped by my office, “She passed away yesterday.”

This HR job wasn’t about compliance. It was about building a team who could face death every day. And keeping them motivated so they’d show up the next day and do it again.

Employee motivation is a unique challenge in hospice. Turnover is intense. So, I decided to do something about it.

The answer was an employee recommendation program. As I presented it to the CEO, she loved it. I thought it was a done deal until she said this:

“Now go and convince the CFO. But you can’t tell him that I approved it. And once you’ve done that, you’ve got to convince all three CEOs and CFOs under the umbrella company. But you can’t tell them that I approved it.”

By the time I was done, it felt like I had given birth… to an accountant.

Soon, we started tracking specific initiatives all the way to the P&L statement. We ran a contest to reduce Accounts Receivable by five days. Another contest drove the sales team to bring in specific types of new clients.

It reminded me of that uncomfortable interview with Candy Russell; “Neil, you’re out of place. You just don’t realize it yet.” I finally saw what she saw… the role of HR is to achieve business objectives through people.

Several years later, I found myself out of place again.

The pandemic hit and I took a job that I shouldn’t have. The CEO only understood motivation through fear. She seemed more focused on the rules than any stickler in HR.

It felt like I was standing on the edge of the cliff. All I saw was darkness.

My wife put her hand on my shoulder and started talking. Her voice was calm, but certain.

“Neil, it will be fine. Just do it. I believe in you.”

Again, someone saw something in me that I had not seen in myself. Sadly, many of us walk through life without being understood. Everyone needs others who see our potential.

So, 23 years after leaving the city of aliens, I launched our team of fractional HR folks. We don’t have green skin or egg-shaped heads. But we are the aliens of HR.

Remember, we come in peace. So, no, we’re not here to say, “No.”

The biggest misunderstanding about HR is that it’s actually an operations role. Sure, there are always compliance issues. But the most important mission of HR is to support, and lead people to accomplish the goals of the business.